Dear MI5

Dear MI5 and other interested parties,

Just left a meeting of fellow lone maverick eco-extremists. Some interesting plans have been hatched. Mostly we plan to go to the pub this afternoon. Different pubs, of course. We are lone maverick eco-extremists after all.

With that in mind, I also plan to get some hummus and bread for my dinner. I'll do it covertly, in a manner that will not draw attention to myself. I have heard that MI5 has agents positioned in Tesco stores around the UK. Every purchase of hummus is recorded on a government database. As we all know hummus is one of the staple foods of a lone maverick eco-extremist; most of us are vegans. The middle classes quite like hummus as well, but there are also slowly being won over by the Greens, so soon they will have to be properly monitored.

Sincerely,
‘Lone Maverick’ Eco-Extremist No.143, Cell 54, Based in the UK.

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